Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Randomize
