Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize