Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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