Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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