ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
