Where are you?
In a non slutty way
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
