i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
