I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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