If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Randomize
