Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
