Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
