I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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