We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
