did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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