I want to walk on stilts...naked
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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