His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
