It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
