STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
