the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
