i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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