Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
