Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
