im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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