i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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