how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
