We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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