i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
