just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
