My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
The best revenge is premature balding
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
