he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
