You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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