I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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