I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Randomize
