I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
