So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
where does the pee come out of this thing
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm passing your future prison.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
