Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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