Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
