Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
She even gives head with a lisp.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
