Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
