I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
