i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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