OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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