I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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