You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
