Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize