bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
