why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
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