he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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