Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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