So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
