I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
