super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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